Monday, June 22, 2009

False Alarm

Did you know that you can only have 100 readers on a private blog? After additional emails and requests we hit our limit. So now we are just like the rest of you bloggers out there. Exposed to the World Wide Web. It's alright though I suppose. I guess I will continue blogging from where my last post ended.

The weekend our baby girl joined us our whole ward and family pulled together to get flights, programs, flowers and everything else needed to plan a funeral. We had a memorial service on May 25th, Memorial Day. Fitting we thought. The speakers (Spencer's mom and my dad) did a great job, and a cute little girl- Caroline- sang "I Am a Child of God." The program was short and sweet. Our bishop wrote an awesome poem that he read just before the closing. One of the hardest parts of the day was giving the tiny casket to the funeral director who placed it in the back of the hurse. A full size hurse. Her casket looked so small and lonely in there. We are so grateful for all the time and talents that were rendered on our behalf that day. Larae Rahm was kind enough to offer her photography skills and got a ton of great pictures of the day. Kim Benham put together a book that everyone attending could sign. Lots of great ladies helped to put the flowers together. It was just such a nice day. Also- Thanks to Tara for the great "IT'S A GIRL" banner that she made for a future baby shower, Thanks Cous. We used it a little earlier than planned. I guess I didn't realize at the time just how pale and chubby I was until Larae showed me the pictures. yikes. After the service Spencer and I took a nice long nap on the couch. (My dad is quite the creeper.) We are so happy that we have each other and that we have continued to hear good news from our doctors at all of the postop visits. Thank you for all the prayers. Ward members have brought by books and family members have sent letters and cards filled with comforting words. In one particular book it spoke about the verse found in D&C 42:45 "Thou shalt live together in love, insomuch that thou shalt weep for the loss of them that die..." It made me feel a little bit better about having sadness. Before I had felt almost guilty when I couldn't fight tears back and they would spill over my eyes. I felt that if I really understood the Gospel and its teachings that I would have no desire to cry but reading through that scripture assured me that it's okay to be sad. Despite all we are really enjoying our summer and have even since then traveled to Florida (look forward to hearing about that in my next post) I have learned that trials make you stronger, and bed rest makes you weaker. I went out for my first day of "light exercise" (whatever that means) which included a 3 mile walk. For two days after I moved like a 90 year old walking on a board of nails. It's amazing how fast your body gets out of shape- and not so amazing how hard it is to get back in to shape.

It's just another thing that has come out of this situation that will take some work.

For more pictures from the Memorial Service click HERE
Turn up the volume and press PLAY.

23 comments:

Aaron & Stacey Salmon said...

Wish we could have been there. Love you guys!
SS

Diane said...

Sara, the pictures are beautiful and so are you. Thank you for sharing your experience. I am so SAD we are not going to see you in July. We can't even come down for a dinner as I am involved in a Laurel camp that week. We MISS you a lot. Can you and Spencer come up and visit when you are back in Utah? Come up and we will pamper you both. Love you so much. Aunt Diane

Courtney Bartlett Morris said...

:( love you guys.

Meghan Crenshaw said...

the pictures are very beautiful. I'm am so sorry for you both. I am so grateful for this gospel and to know that you both will be with sara again. Love you

Lana Dawn said...

just have so much love for you and spence.


YBIMH-- just like when we were 12

Kasey & Erin said...

I just now saw your past 2 posts. Kasey called me as I realized I haven't read them yet so I read it aloud to him on the phone and of course I totally started crying because it was so touching and personal and I just wanted you to know that we love you and we are always thinking about you and always praying for you. You guys are so strong. I'm sure you have heard this before but heavenly father doesn't give you a trial you can't handle. I know that with this gospel it makes things easier but not to the point that it doesn't hurt at all. Its nice to know that you will get to meet and raise her one day because you were married in the temple!

We love you guys and when we are all back in Provo we will def take you on a date!! ha ha ha

Meagan Cooper said...

I have been so touched by reading your past 2 posts, (I suppose being prego and all, my hormones are extra crazy) I am glad that you had a beautiful funeral for your little girl.

nataley said...

Sara, you are so strong. Thanks for sharing the pictures, the funeral was beautiful. Your family is in my prayers.

KandyJill said...

Sara I just want you to know how much I love you! Your posts are so touching and are so hard to read because I ache for you and Spence! It looks like you guys had a beautiful funeral for your baby girl -- the photos are beautiful! I love you so much!! You guys are in my prayers!

kjerstina said...

We want you to know we have been praying for you and sending lots of love your direction. Thanks for sharing such a tender event. What a beautiful tribute to a sweet little girl.

Tara Fears said...

Sara, I'm so sad I couldn't be at the funeral. It looked like it was a special program! I'm so excited to see you in a few weeks!!!

John and Emily said...

dude that pic of you and spenc on the couch cracks me up! One day when you least expect it I will make and finish "your book" of "sleeping" pictures. hahahahah LOVE YOU! See you soon

Erin said...

i just wanted to say that I've been thinking and prayer about you and spencer! And I think you both are so incredible! I love you!!! ps.
The pictures are beautiful!
Oh and its good to know you can't have over 100 friends when your accounts private! :)

Mary Dawn said...

It looked like a beautiful ceremony. Sara you and spencer do everything with such elegance and poise. I love you and i'm thinking of you.

Jason and Shannon Salmon said...

We love you guys!!! Wished we could have been there. I can't believe what you have been through the first few months of your marriage! You have learned a lot. Those picutres mad me cry! We are lucky to have the gospel. You guys are in our prays. Can't wait to see you!

Kay said...

I wish we could have been there. The pictures are beautiful. It's so wonderful to have the Gospel and to really KNOW that your little Angel Sara is waiting for you.

Dawny said...

Oh Sara, my heart goes out to you and Spencer. What an unbelievable trial to face. And you sound like you're doing it with such courage. I love you! I hope you are feeling the love and comfort that you deserve. I was looking through the pictures and realized I know your home ward bishop. I dated his son, how random. But anyway, he and his wife are such great people...I'm glad you were able to be surrounded by your family and those who love and care about you. You're in my thoughts and prayers.

MJ said...

LOVE YOU.
MJ

Uncle David said...

Thank you for the privilege of reading your thoughts and feeling of your testimony. May the Lord bless both of you. Lots of love.

Kelly said...

Sara, I just got around to reading your blog. I was out of town. Wow, that was totally unexpected for me. Thanks for sharing it with us all. I don't know what to say, but I know that I am thankful for my testimony of the gospel. It is definitely the gospel of hope and happiness, even in trying times. May Heavenly Father pour his blessings down upon you both. We love you guys a lot.

Lauren Evans said...

i just love you

Alison Lee said...

I just wanted to let you know that I love you Sara!
Alison

Anonymous said...

i lost my daughter also and randomly found this blog. it was so nice to read. I cried for both of our little girls.